Valentines Day? Newly Single? Take Yourself Out!

Valentine’s Day sucks. Especially if you’re newly single and trying to piece back together the fragments of your heart and remember who you are without a man in your life (woah dramatic right?). But this isn’t a depressing post. This is a fucking happy post. Life has been crazy recently and I’m sure yours has been too (I’m suspecting there’s something in the air). I feel like maybe it’s February, just as you’re getting settled into 2018, February comes to slap you in the face and say ‘wake up bitch, don’t you dare get comfortable!’

Well after my ‘Me Day’ I am wide awake and refreshed, in love with myself and proud of who I am.

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I thought there might be a few others out there who may be having a rough time at the moment, and I get it, it sucks. But it’s not going to last forever, and it certainly isn’t the end of the world. So I wanted to tell you about my day and hopefully inspire you to do the same, and love yourself that little bit harder in your time of need.

“Hi, you’ve reached Adelaide. Sorry I can’t take your call right now. It’s ADELAIDE DAY today and I’m out taking care of myself. Leave a message and I’ll get back to you whenever I feel like it.”

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Cancel Work

I work casually, however lately, work has consumed my life. It’s good though, with so much craziness in my life it’s been a great distraction. I love my work and my work mates. But my Adelaide Day meant not coming in to work. I emailed my boss and was completely honest. Hey, I know I’m supposed to work tomorrow, but my life has been a bit crazy lately and I really just need a day to gather my thoughts and look after myself. Do you mind if I have an Adelaide Day? Because I work with such amazing and supportive people, she said yes and just like that, my day was free.

Sleep In

I’ve recently been converted to a morning person which means that if I wake up after 7am I feel like I’ve wasted my day. I love waking up early, watching the sunrise and getting a head start on my day. But this is Adelaide Day, and Adelaide required a sleep in. I slept until 9:30am and honestly, felt so rested. It was simply glorious waking up without an alarm, with sunlight shining through my window.

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Beach & Sunshine

There’s nothing that says ‘I love you Adelaide’ like a dip in the ocean and a nap on the beach. I headed down to soak up some rays with Dylan. There’s something so medicating about the ocean that instantly washes away your problems and invigorates you with energy and life. I laid in the sun just a little longer than I normally would and felt so relaxed. When I got home and looked in the mirror, I felt like I’d been at a spa treatment all day. I felt sleepy, relaxed, smelled of coconut and my hair was a mess.

A Bite To Eat

I love going out for lunch and I love going out solo. I went to one of my favourite cafe’s, ordered my favourite meal, with my favourite coffee and wrote in my journal. You’ve gotta look after your taste-buds and caffeinate.

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Retail Therapy

Nothing says treat yourself like a new outfit or two. Even if it’s just trying on clothes to get some ideas, I love a little window shopping. And I love it even more when I find gorgeous clothes that make me feel like the Queen I am (or think I am – depends if you get me on a confident day or not). I bought some gorgeous flowy pants, some crop tops and some sparkly underwear for Mardi Gras (which I’m way too excited about). Sometimes you just have to tap your card and not look at the total – that’s future you’s problem.

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Cooking

A little known fact about me is that I absolutely love cooking, I just rarely find the time or inspiration. But on my Me Day, there was no excuse. I made some delicious burritos for Tiger and Chloe. Plus we had an extravagant cheese board with a few too many beers. Cutting, chopping and creating something delicious and nutritious for your body and tastebuds sure is rewarding.

Sex & The City Marathon

Did you know that Sex & The City can cure anything? Yep. Fact. By chance, a SATC marathon was on TV. Naturally, we stayed up til midnight watching it. One beer per episode. By the time it reached midnight, I was pretty tipsy and feeling pretty damn amazing.

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I know it’s not always possible to have an extraordinary Me Day. There’s work, prior commitments, homework…. the thing is that in our crazy lives, these things will always be there. Sometimes you just have to cancel your day and show yourself a little love. Maybe I just didn’t do this enough when I was in a relationship. Take some time for me. But hey, at least I won’t forget it any time soon. And I think it’s something we have to do every now and again. Plus, who doesn’t love a SATC marathon?!

Be strong. Be kind. Be kind to yourself. And have a break. You deserve it. 

10 Things I ‘Learned’ From Lena Dunham

Having smashed through the hilariously witty novel ‘Not That Kind of Girl,’ I just had to share with you how incredibly f*cking awesome it is and the 10 things I have ‘learned.’

Get it and get it now
Get it and get it now

1. Lena is ridiculously talented. Actress, director, writer, and independent strong women who don’t need no man (or woman for that matter). Her humble success seeps through the pages of this book and episodes of her TV show ‘Girls,’ injecting me with drive and excitement that I too one day could accomplish great things.

2. Even though there’s no such thing as ‘normal,’ Lena makes all of your bizarre, morally incorrect, questionable and somewhat insane ideas seem, well… normal.

3. You deserve nothing less than the best, especially when it comes to relationships. All those little doubts that we have in our mind about ourselves are absolutely obliterated by the following passage.

“Being treated like shit is not an amusing game or a transgressive intellectual experiment. It’s something you accept, condone, and learn to believe you deserve. This is so simple. But I tried so hard to make it complicated.” 

4. We don’t need to confine to labels. Whether it be single, in a relationship, gay, straight, bi, happy, sad, anxious, crazy, fat, skinny… as soon as we assume one of these labels, it leads us to subconsciously act and think in a certain way relating to that label. Lena discusses her ‘girl crush’ and how she hates using the term because it implies inferiority to other crushes or relationships. But the fact of the matter is, that happy people can have sad days, straight people can be attracted to someone of the same sex, and even though it’s hot at 30degrees outside, it can still rain.

5. Confidence is the most timeless fashion you can wear.

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6. Girls have quite a lot of shit to deal with at any one time. She splits her book up into various parts addressing issues like; body image and self confidence, sex, sexuality and relationships, family and friends, careers and pursuits and everything in between. If anything, this book is an ode to women and all that we can do and are capable of doing/dealing with at any one time.

7. Challenge yourself! Because great things don’t happen to you in the warmth and familiarity of your comfort zone.

“It’s not brave to do something that doesn’t scare you.”

8. Break ups are tough and there’s no easy or right way to do it. Having just dealt with a break up of my own, it’s hard to come to terms with the whole concept of love, being single again and just readjusting to a life without that someone special. Whilst I was the one who ended things, my heart felt just as broken. However, Lena made me feel brave and empowered that I had put my heart and emotions first and that ultimately was taking control of who I wanted to be and where I wanted to go. It was an absolutely terrifying experience but at the end of the day, I know it’s for the best for both of us and that a few months from now I’ll be able to look back on that relationship with fond memories.

9. Keep on writing and keep on telling my story. I sometimes feel a little hesitant to write, let alone call myself a writer of any description because I guess sometimes I don’t feel qualified to write about the sort of things I do or that I haven’t had enough life experience. But the thing is that everyone has a different perspective on something, different values and different experiences which shared with the world, can contribute to a better understanding of one another.

“There is nothing gutsier to me than a person announcing that their story is one that deserves to be told, especially if that person is a woman. As hard as we have worked and as far as we have come, there are still so many forces conspiring to tell women that our concerns are petty, our opinions aren’t needed, that we lack the gravitas necessary for our stories to matter. That personal writing by women is no more than an exercise in vanity and that we should appreciate this new world for women, sit down, and shut up.”

10. Each and every one of you reading this is beautiful. I think this is an idea that will take a while to fully internalise, but it’s definitely growing on me. After finishing this book, with a smile on my face, I had an amazing realisation that I am me. If someone doesn’t like that, that’s not my problem at all. I feel like I’ve discovered a new found self confidence where I’m not afraid to let the real me show and flaunt my flaws.

So I hope this has inspired you to run down to your local book shop and devour her tasteful words.

xxx A